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02/22/2003 Entry: "Life is Fragile"

On Thursday I conducted a funeral, along with two other pastors, of a 15 year old boy who died in a tragic bicycle accident on Friday, February 14. Shane and his mother and sister had been my neighbors when I lived in our old parsonage. Being the "mean" neighborhood dad who reminded kids to wear their bike helmets when riding or skateboarding, Shane and the 3 boys he was riding with that night had had to hear my bicycle helmet speech more than once. I had even bought a helmet for one of the boys, but none were wearing them that evening. For some reason, when you're 15 you feel indestructible and anything that adults want you to do is not what you're likely to do. I still have vague remembrances of being a teenager.

That night the boys decided to jump their bicycles off a three foot wall down to a loading ramp in front of the Red Barn Furniture store. The other three were successful, but Shane's bike wheel must have caught on the edge of the wall. Propelled by the weight of the bike, Shane's head took the brunt of the impact with the concrete. He died almost instantly and three other young people lost much of what's left of childhood innocence as they scrambled to try to help their friend and find help. The medical examiner said that had Shane been wearing a helmet he would have survived with only a very bad headache or, at worst, a concussion.

Adding to this tragedy is the fact that only four or five months earlier a twelve year old, Ryan, who had been in my daughter's kindergarten class and had at one time been a part of our church died when he turned his bike into the path of a car coming up behind him. He was wearing dark clothing riding a bike with no lights and he was wearing no helmet (in this case, a helmet probably would not have helped).

Both boys were full of life. They had played little league baseball, had numerous friends and were active in their churches. In two tragic instances of misjudgement, there are now two gaping holes in our community where these youngsters should have been growing into adulthood.

Shane was also an Explorer Scout with our local volunteer fire department. It was his job to open the firehouse doors and get the trucks started while the other volunteers arrived. Shane was one of the first to respond the night Ryan died. Last Friday, when the call went out, the first clue anyone had that it was for Shane was when they arrived at the station and found the doors still closed and no trucks ready to roll.

At Thursday's service there were almost 400 people representing various fired departments, police agencies and rescue squads. Neighbors, friends, classmates and family filled the pews. A wonderful service was held for this young man and, in many ways, for the rest of us. Facing war, economic problems and other world-altering events, this was an all too close to home reminder of how fragile life really is. As chaplain for the fire department, I responded to both these calls. I had to witness the bloodstained sheets covering the bodies of two young people I had known and my children had known and played with and gone to school with. I had to try to bring comfort to grieving families asking the question "why" and having no real answers. To try to make something positive out of these tragedies, I asked permission of Shane's mother to show my bicycle helmet to the congregation and challenge children and parents alike to make sure that they wear this simple, inexpensive item so that we wouldn't have to meet like this again anytime soon. On my helmet now are two names: Ryan 1990-2002 and Shane 1987-2003. I've had several kids tell me they're going to do the same thing and they will wear their helmets. I've already had adults tell me they're not going to ignore children riding or skateboarding without helmets. It really does take a village to raise a child and it looks like our village is starting to take this seriously.

I couldn't help but note a couple ironies in the midst of this tragedy. Shane was given a full honors firefighter funeral procession and burial. His casket was carried to the cemetery in an old fashioned firetruck. All the firefighters, police, chaplains, family etc. marched behind the casket. After the committal portion of the service, the Chief gave Shane's mother a folded US flag and then presented her with his firefighter's helmet with his name on it. Shane would never have thought to respond to a fire without this protective gear. If only our young people and adults alike felt the same way about taking on daily, routine activies. The other irony is that the next day I buried a 95 year old member of the church who had lived just behind Shane's house. Both of them lived behind the firehouse and were known in the community. If only Shane had lived till 95 like Ruth, then the story would have had a happy ending.

I hope that this rambling, train of thought expose, has not been too morbid. I'm just tired of burying our youngsters. There's enough challenge out there without having to deal with these kind of events that can easily be avoided. I hope we all become involved villagers as we try to raise and protect our children to become productive, well adjusted adults who want to make our world a better place to raise their own children and grandchildren.

Peace.

Ivan The Crank