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07/02/2002 Entry: "Some practical differences in funeral services"

Today I had the privilege of conducting the funeral service of a long-time constituent of the Sketty Methodist Church, David Richards. This is the second funeral I've been involved in since coming to Sketty and I thought I might comment on some of the differences that I've noticed between here and back in the Leesburg area.

If a family chooses cremation here, then the date for the funeral is selected based upon when the crematorium is available. A funeral can be up to week after a person's death. Unlike in the US where someone would be cremated before any memorial service without anyone but the crematory staff present, the trip to the crematorium here replaces the trip to the cemetery.

With both services, there was no viewing the night before at the funeral home. The hearse arrives at the church just before the service begins and the pastor(s) walk before the casket, a simple triangular shaped wooden box much like you would see in the movies about the old west. The family walks in behind the casket which is placed in the chancel area. The rest of the service is then very similar to what I've been used to.

We then travel to the crematorium like we would to the cemetery in procession. At the crematory the same kind of procession takes place and the casket is placed upon a platform in the chancel area of the chapel. After a prayer and a hymn, the words of committal are given and I was given the task to push a big green button that caused the casket to be lowered into the basement of the facility where it is transfered to the place for cremation. (I have to say, I was somewhat intimidated by the responsibility of pushing that button and watching the remains of someones' loved one disappear from site. I was afraid that I might not have done it at exactly the right time in the service, but was assured that is was just right.) Final prayers are made and the benediction given, and all of this has to happen in about 20 minutes so that the next funeral can come in. For those in Florida who have ever attended a graveside service at the National Cemetery in Bushnell, this is the closest thing that I can compare the process to, with one burial after another going on all day there.

The family then steps outside, greets those who have come for the committal and then, as in the US, many return to spend time in the family's home with food and drink.

I hope this topic is not too morbid, but having conducted funerals for 18 years, this is the most unusual variation to what I'm used to that I have experienced. Funeral customs also say a lot about a people, and that is no exception here. In a nation where coal mining, heavy industry, etc. have been a part of life for so long, so has dealing with the reality of death. I found that the services that I've participated in are very worshipful and healthy for all who attend, and conducive to helping the healing begin. I also found that having a committal at the crematorium, with the lowering of the casket after saying "dust to dust, etc." somehow seems more appropriate than our memorial services without the body present. In some ways, I think it actually takes the reality of death more serious and there is a finality (until the resurrection) that may help people process the death more readily. I'm not sure, but it just struck me as something worth commenting on.

On a lighter note, I'm sorry that Richard and Jayne and youngins have had to endure the return of a more normal Florida heavy summer rain pattern. I've been kept updated by folks at home and it sounds like Richard helped bring the rain we've been needing for so long. Not to be outdone, he also left some for Wales, so after several days of beautiful days, the rains have returned and we even had heavy showers for, oh, ten minutes this afternoon. I did give the churches permission yesterday to borrow Florida's expression for rain, "liquid sunshine," since we don't like to admit we have the potential for as much rain as we do in the "Sunshine State."

Peace.

Ivan